A few months ago, I watched the True Life: I'm a Shopaholic episode on MTV. Did you see it? Crazy Ohioan blonde/pink/brunette shops her life away at F21 and Wet Seal, leaving the viewers wondering just how many bills she could have paid off for the price of some knock-off Chanel bags and terrible graphic tees from Wet Seal?
The boyfriend found it hilarious. I found it sickening. Not because I thought "Hey! I identify with these bitches!" No, it was mostly because of the bad wigs, bad fashion, bad therapy sessions, and bad tans.
Still, I'm not blind. Maybe I have a hint of tan, maybe I own a few terrible graphic tees (but no fake bags, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.) And so, here are my confessions.
I am a shopaholic. No two ways about it. I get a thrill out of shopping at Saks, Bloomingdales, Salvation Army, Big Lots....you name it, if I'm swiping a card and walking out with a bag of goodies, I'm happy. I feel as though this condiion started early, and was something that comes from my genetic background. When I was around 4 and people would ask me what my favorite thing to do was, my answer was a resounding "Shop with mommy." Today, if you visit my parents house, my mother has taken over five out of the 6 closets in their house. Heaps of shoes litter the floor of their bedroom. Half the items in her closet(s) still have the tags on it.
Not only am I a shopaholic, I am a bulimic shopper. Haven't heard of us? It's a very serious condition. Have you ever walked out of a store, felt kinda bad about buying something, and then possibly returned it? This probably happens to you maybe once or twice a year. For me? At least 5 times a month. I return approximately 80% of what I buy - clothes I think I need and then realize I'll never wear, purses that I don't need when I already have 5 others just like it, make-up that I "have to have" whilst forgetting that I'm a make-up moron. I read the entire Gossip Girl series using Barnes and Noble as my lending library. I have the best excuses too. "Oh, I bought it as a present but found something else!" or "It was my birthday and someone bought me it as well. Guess I shouldn't shop so close to my big day!" Lately, I've been hitting more clsoe to the truth. "I bought it and realized I had 800 others just like it."
And while I am a shopaholic, I am also a thrifty shopaholic. Who isn't, in times like these? I refuse to call myself a "recessionista", however. Ew. Gross. Ross, Marshall's, outlet stores, Ebay, Ebates, Mysurvey.com, Amazon, Slickdeals.net, Makeupalley, Currentcodes.com.... I'd consider myself more than a regular. My favorite past-time these days if scouring thrift stores for items to either wear myself, or sell on Ebay for a profit. Biggest tip? Salvation Army stores have no clue what they have. I recently bought a pair of 7 for all Mankind A pockets and sold them on Ebay for 5 times what I paid for them.
And as for my last confession? Well, that's to be revealed in subsequent blog entries, as I take you through my latest and greatest purchases, returns, great deals, ebay scores, items I'm currently coveting, and more. Every day, I inch just one closer to True Life status. I'll use this blog as my therapy instead.
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